Thursday, December 12, 2019
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Dereks to be extinct within the next five years

By Livi Ngroom A CAMPAIGN has been launched to save the ‘Derek’ after it was revealed that the world’s last living Derek could be dead...

Film banned after showing graphic depiction of man doing housework

By Livi Ngroom BASSETT Rivers Cinema has banned the film Modern Life after it showed shocking scenes of a man doing housework. The film, which stars...

Post truth pub quiz to be held

A new post truth pub quiz is to be held on Monday evening at the Stag and iPod pub on Bassett Rivers high street. It...

Bassett Rivers MP Bane ‘Drive-by’ Bullet’s monthly Column – “Dis Brexit ting iz like...

Dis Brexit ting iz like getting well dull. Every day dere iz more newz dat iz like talkin’ about stuff dat none of us MPz...

Agony Girl answers your questions…

Four year old Amy is loving school but is getting quite tired after a long a day but she still finds time to do...

Bassett Rivers Echo – Giant cheques to discontinue as bank discovers that giants are...

THE Bank of Bassett Rivers has announced that it will no longer be issuing giant cheques. Bank manager Melvin Bogtrotter announced the move as part...

Agony Girl answers your questions…

Four year old Amy has just started school and this is her first time doing Agony Girl and she doesn’t really know what the...

Daily Mail moves operations to the ninth circle of hell

The Daily Mail has moved its operations from Northcliffe House in swanky Kensington to Judecca which is otherwise known as the ninth circle of...

Aftershave ad banned for actually making sense

By Livi Ngroom AN ADVERT for aftershave featuring a normal looking man putting on after shave and then being told by his plain girlfriend that...

Agony Girl answers your questions…

Ten year old Annabel is retiring this month after six years at the helm. But she’s still had time to answer your problems. We...
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